Thursday, 4 June 2015

Some Thoughts

I have found myself day dreaming about the life I used to live before all the madness, thinking back to a time when I lived a care free, sin filled life. Not to say I don't sin now but you get what I mean.

I am ashamed to say I find myself longing for my previous life sometimes. I know the bible tells us not to look back and to look forward, Philippians 3:12-14 reads:
12 Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. 13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Also Jesus Christ himself says in Luke 9:62:
62 But Jesus said to him, “No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.”

I am being tested, to see how strong my faith is. It is hard because I am not part of any local church and the only other Christian I know is at my job. I know the Lord has got me this far and I must trust in him to see me through to the end.

On Tuesday I went to see my psychiatrist and I told him I was having problems sleeping when I am due in work. He proceeded to prescribe me some more drugs, sleeping tablets this time. I will give them a go, although I know that if I was just left alone I would be able to sleep just fine. We also spoke about me claiming benefits, he seems to think that I can claim something while I am still working. I don't want to go down that road but if I have to quit my job because of this then I will need to get some money from somewhere. Hopefully I will continue to work.



  1. I am a TI living in South Carolina, USA. I am a Christian as well. I have been targeted for a very long time, it just didnt go overt until Sept. 2011. I have lost my wife and child to this stuff (had to get divorced, scared for their safety). I am typing on my phone, so I would like to get in touch with you....even if you are in England, these people are masters at keeping TIs seperated from each other. Most of the groups you see when you google "targeted individual" are front groups for the perps doing this stuff. I believe is legit (no i am not a part of it). Anyway, my email is I would love to keep in touch, share Bible verses, etc.

  2. Hi,
    I sent you an email, not sure if you got it, hope you're doing OK.

    God bless